That Seductive Seitan!

WARNING: If you are gluten-sensitive or gluten-intolerant, close your eyes now, 'cause I'm about to hit you with a mega-dose of gluten-y goodness.

When I started eating an entirely vegan diet in 1997 (I am no longer a strict vegan, but I'm still in the habit of eating only plant-based foods most of the time), there were not many "fake meat" products available anywhere.  It was tofu, tofu, tofu, and after I'd cooked that up about a thousand ways, I was tired of it.  I wanted chewiness, I wanted density, I wanted meaty-ness.  So I flipped out when I found Veggie Ribs dry mix in the health food store, because it was exactly what I wanted.  The mix was essentially vital wheat gluten flour (made from wheat protein, with the bran and starch removed) with spices and flavoring added.  I had no idea what gluten flour was and I didn't care--I just knew that when I mixed it with water and tahini, it turned into good, chewy, fake ribs. I later learned that this is called "seitan" or "wheat gluten".

Over the years, a million vegan blogs and cookbooks popped up and taught me that I could actually make my own seitan, from scratch, from plain ol' wheat gluten flour.  I was intrigued.  I started buying the stuff in bulk and experimenting with the various methods (boiling, baking, steaming, deep-frying) and realized that the possibilities are absolutely endless with this stuff.  It didn't hurt that seitan was also lower in calories and fat than meat, plus it had 16 grams of protein per 3 oz. serving.  Bitchin'!

As much as I love gluten, I only eat it about once a week because it can make me a little tired and big-bellied if I eat more than a small serving (which I always end up doing because I make it so damn good). Some people say it makes them feel crappy. Other people can eat it daily, no problem. And, yet, others (the 1% of Americans with Celiac Disease) can't eat it at all without severe gastrointestinal pain.  Bummer.

Controversial food, eh?

Behold, the "Seitanic Super Bowl Spread":

Saucy Seitan Wings with "Bleu Cheese" Dip, 
Asparagus, and Watermelon Radishes
HOT WINGS (melted Earth Balance & Louisiana Hot Sauce)
SESAME WINGS (tamari, maple syrup, ginger, garlic, sesame oil & sesame seeds)
SPICY BBQ WINGS (Bulls-Eye, Sriracha, yellow mustard)

I used to follow an exact recipe for the seitan, but now I change up the ingredients every time I make it. I'll add oil or peanut butter for a fattier texture, or use red wine in place of water, or use twice as much onion powder, whatever, it doesn't matter, it always comes out GOOD.

 Instead of boiling the kneaded seitan in broth, I cut up the dough into wing-sized pieces and baked them on a cookie sheet for about 15 minutes at 350.  I then slathered them in their sauces and put them back in the oven for 3 minutes.  The "Bleu Cheese" Dip is 1/2 soy yogurt, 1/2 Vegenaise, and a spoonful of preserved bean curd. Um. Really good.  My husband and I may have eaten that entire platter.

And if you're in the mood for pepperoni...

Spicy Seitanic Pepperoni

While I was cooking tomato sauce for some pizza the other night, I thought that spicy pepperoni sounded pretty excellent, and luckily I still had some gluten flour.  I used the basic seitan recipe that floats around in my head, but added sausage-y ingredients, like: crushed red pepper flakes, smoked sea salt, fennel, thyme, oregano, nutmeg and olive oil.  Rolled a few chunks into links and wrapped them tightly in foil, then just put them in the toaster oven at 375 degrees for about 12 minutes.  Opened up the foil and let them cook 3 more minutes. They sort of steam themselves this way, but the outer layer gets nice and toasty.  I love love love the way these came out and I want to use them in a pasta dish or stuff them in a sandwich soon.


Of course, since I was already making sauce and pepperoni, I figured I should experiment with some "cheese" for my pizza....

Seitanic Pepperoni Pizza with Nut Ricotta

(on whole wheat crust, courtesy of Trader Joe's)

I've heard than macadamia nuts make great spreads and "ricotta-like" cheeses when blended up, so that's what I went for.  In the Magic Bullet, I mixed macadamia nuts, siken tofu, water, onion and garlic powders, preserved bean curd (for that cheesy flavor), nutritional yeast, salt & pepper, oregano and umeboshi plum paste (nut butters and pastes always seem a little sweet for me, so the tart umeboshi helps balance it out).  Yep.  I will make this again.  It was perfect on the pizza and even turned a little golden in the oven, but it's  also good just as a cold spread or dip.  It's even better two days later when the flavors have really meshed, aww yeah. 


Okay, you can open your eyes now!  I think in order to make up for the serious seitan overdose, I will have to make my next post entirely gluten-free.  Ideas?  Anyone craving something that is hard to find sans-gluten?  I'm up for the challenge...